As I was looking for the visual to start this blog I saw myself inundated with a variety of “bumperstickerisms.”

“You use the same letters in challenge and change!”

“Find your comfort zone, then leave it!”

“Life begins at the end of your comfort zone!”

And to this I say, “Aw phooey!” I could make a lot of memes that say a lot of things, but it doesn’t necessarily mean these are true.  And why does it always seem that, to a lot of people, when they tell you “get out of your comfort zone,” all they really mean is “Get on stage and act silly for awhile!   Sing!   Perform!  Get out of your comfort zone”?

Again, Phooey!

Isn’t there something to be said for staying INSIDE your comfort zone?  You figure out what you’re REALLY good at… and perfect THAT.  I look at these Olympic athletes these last few weeks.  I’m pretty sure they’re in their comfort zone.  I watch artists, writers, actresses, actors….comfort zone.

Yes, no doubt… they push themselves within their abilities and beyond…  but they are still in that range where they’re comfortable.

Why do I bring this up?  What’s the exigence?  Well, this week I was making a spaghetti noodle tower with a marshmallow at the top of it.  I was also asked to dress up and perform a skit or a cheer of some kind. I was asked to do things that didn’t fall into my personality range…  Each year, I’m asked to be part of a dance routine, to cheer loudly at pep rallies, and a myriad of other things that are not in my character.  I’ve been asked to do this for 23 years now… and I don’t think these things have changed me at all… other than to make me want to hide even more when I see them coming.

I have nothing against the people who set them up.  I understand what they hope they will accomplish, and I’m sure they accomplish these things for a lot of people…  For me, they are just exercises in feeling exposed, embarrassed, inadequate…

I remind myself that it’s probably good to feel that way sometimes… to feel so exquisitely unprepared and ill equipped that I think of how my students feel at times so that I can better empathize… and I suppose that’s a good part of it.  Maybe if I’m working with group members who feel the same as I do we can support each other through our misery?

I’m nervous writing this blog because I’m afraid the people who worked so hard together to do something “fun” will read this and be offended or hurt.  I don’t mean to make them feel that way.  I’m just writing for how I feel… and for how others may as well.

I’m what I consider an unusual personality.  I am shy and introverted while being vocal and outspoken.  People often think this means I’m snotty, cliquish, or elitist… but that’s not it.  It’s just that I’m not comfortable with gregarious small talk and parties and being goofy.

Nor do I wish I were.  I’m fine with eschewing those things.  I don’t judge people who LIKE those activities. I’m just not one of them. I like smaller groups with people I know better.

I’ve never been in a situation where someone says “Okay, step outside of your comfort zone, everyone.  Write a blog about how you feel about euthanasia and then share your opinion with the group!”  For me, that would be right in my wheelhouse!   Wow!   I’d LOVE that!  Make you cringe?  Not me. But ask me to put on a funny mustache and do the electric slide again…  ugggggggghhhhhh!

“Okay, everyone… step outside of your comfort zone!   Today, we’re going to write a persuasive speech about the importance of third party politics.  Get together in a group with two people who disagree with you!”

Yup… I’d like that, too!

See what I mean?  There’s nothing I dislike more than dressing up and performing in front of a large group.  It’s not stage fright.  I don’t have stage fright.  I will get on the microphone and address 500 people or three people regarding something about which I feel strongly… but to entertain for the sake of entertaining…  No thanks…

So I want to go to the pep rally.. .and I cry when I watch my kids perform.  And I want to go to the game, and I am fully invested while I am watching everyone else in their comfort zone…

…including you… that teacher over there…  getting that whole section on their feet  all excited to jump up and down!   You go on with your bad self…

…just please stop asking me to join in.