I don’t have kids. If I did, I’m positive I would be the worst helicopter parent on the planet. I won’t even let my dog go into another room without seeing where he is…and I won’t leave him at home on cleaning lady days because I don’t want him to be upset by a vacuum cleaner. Instead, he goes to daycare which costs pretty much the same amount it would if I had a kid.
If I had kids, I would be the snowplow parent… the helicopter parent… the one who just knew that my kid was a special, special snowflake and other people really didn’t see just how great my kid was. Oh, he would probably be a boy… a special, unique, snowflake boy.
I’d be AWFUL… I admit this.
As someone who doesn’t have kids… who KNOWS I would do the same thing… this is me… Judging…
I saw a
Chevy Malibu commercial this morning where the selling point was that the car would keep a “report card” for parents of their teenagers’ driving habits.
Oh. For. The. Love.
Is it not enough that they have GPS on their bodies 24/7… that you text them 27 times a day? You know where they are, who they’re with, and what they’re doing at every second of their lives… Now you need their CAR to rat on them???
Yes, you remember your childhood and your own shenanigans and that’s why you monitor them…You remember all the trouble you got into… almost got into. You’re pretty sure you’re on your 10th life, not your 9th. You did things that were outlandish, crazy, dangerous… Sometimes some really bad things happened. They aren’t even funny looking back now…. they were scary and bad. They are all things that you can protect your special, special snowflake from ever going through.
But I truly think there is a consequence for no consequences.
What does this do to kids’ self esteem? How will they develop the confidence to handle problems on their own when they know that you’re always going to be there to rescue them? Dealing with mistakes, consequences, repercussions… this is all part of life.
You get to make soft mistakes (granted, some of the soft mistakes are harder than others) when you’re a kid. You get to learn how to deal with those mistakes BY YOURSELF.
A friend recently posted about driving through a neighborhood in the morning and seeing students on EVERY corner waiting for the bus to stop. Parents didn’t want kids to have to cross streets to get to bus stops in a subdivision. Parents in my own neighborhood complain that their child’s school bus is not in a place where they can see it from the window of their house. Many of the parents are standing at the school bus stop WITH THEIR CHILDREN. School started a MONTH ago. Some of these kids are middle school aged. There are video cameras on every school bus and in the corner of every school.
Some of these video cameras show images of students being hit by negligent drivers! It’s terrifying.
Oh my gosh, I truly can’t imagine how painful it would be to allow failure as a parent. I can’t imagine what I would feel if my child… my flesh and blood… came to me and asked me for help and I refused. I can’t imagine if it were a situation where I knew I could help him, and I said “no” anyway. How could I begin to deal with his disappointment and hurt when I could help him… when I could have prevented his getting in the situation to BEGIN with… when I could have made my child happy??? There can be NOTHING… and I mean NOTHING worse than an unhappy child. A parent can only EVER be as happy as her unhappiest child… I could go ahead and protect him. I could go ahead and solve that problem.
But what message does that send to your kid? You get them a car that gives you a report card? The state gave your kid a driver’s license… they took the test… they know the rules…Isn’t it time to give them a chance to try? Can’t they go out with their friends and have a curfew without your knowing exactly where they are? Can’t they try to take care of their schoolwork without you checking teacher websites and grades every day? Can’t they try to handle a conflict with a teacher without your calling the principal?
Yes, sometimes bad things happen… sometimes really, really, really bad, irreparable, bad things happen.
But most of the time they don’t…
Oh… again… if I was the parent… I’d be the worst… so it’s easy for me to sit here and judge.
But I’m not the parent… I’m just an observer…and I’m telling you that I’m worried about the future for your special, special snowflake…
and I’m TELLING you what this amount of oversight is doing to your kid. I SEE it happening. This is not just someone who reads about it in a newspaper… I live it EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. Kids are changing… they are less capable of taking care of their day to day problems and issues. They are less likely to try anything new because they are afraid they might be wrong or fail at it. They are unlikely to trust their own judgment…
This can’t all be coincidence… part of this has to be the fault of a Chevy Malibu that is going to send a report card home to parents!!!
Part-Time Teacher; Full-Time Human 