Yes, Yes… I know…  “Tamara, seriously, do you have anything better to do?” Of COURSE, I do…

I took the dog for a two mile walk.  I need to go to the store because i promised to cook dinner.  I need to clean up, but right now I WANT to do this!   (Be glad I’m going back to work on Monday!)

Have you seen this before?  I’ve seen the video, too, that left me thinking “What is that?  No seriously WHAT IS THAT?!?  You say it’s a baby chupacabra?  It CAN’T BE… but WHAT is THAT?” Later on, they said it was a raccoon with mange.  I still have a lot of trouble believing that.  Why does it make that noise?

Walks like a chupacabra, looks like a chupacabra?  Must be a chupacabra? I don’t know that it’s that easy…

So…  let me beat the dead horse a little.  Let’s talk about Jenner.  (I won’t refer to Jenner much directly in this blog because I don’t want to insult or upset anyone by using incorrect pronouns when I am referring to Jenner; therefore, it gets unwieldy,  but Jenner is my “subject” for purposes of my discussion.)

Okay, first I know that the Libertarians say “I couldn’t care less.  I don’t know why there’s so much discussion.  Does this affect ME?  Am I going to have to pay for something regarding this?  As long as there are no laws being made or taxes being spent I couldn’t care less about what this person does.”

I know that the Liberals are saying “Yes!  Yes!   Good for you!   Let the world see who you are!  Be yourself!   You are so strong and so brave! We need someone like you to blaze the path”

And I know the GOP is saying “This is a sin!  It’s a crime against nature!   This is wrong and the Bible says so!”

I find myself wondering about science…  for real… the rationality and the logic of it… My thought about homosexuality has always been that it is perfectly natural.

What makes me think this?  Well, I have never been attracted to a female.  From the time I had my very first attraction, that attraction was to a male.  That was in my nature.  That’s who made me get the warm fuzzies and feel bubble guts.  I wanted to get married and have a husband.  That’s what’s always been in my head. My gay friends tell me it was the same thing with them… they always saw the SAME sex in that matter.  Now, because society shamed them, sometimes they tried valiantly to NOT feel that way… but they couldn’t any more than I could see myself wanting to make a life with another woman.  They’re just not built that way.

I have toyed with whether to make this comparison at all or not…  because I don’t want to be insulting to my gay friends, nor do I want to add fuel to the fire of any dogmatic heterosexuals… but everyone’s BRAIN is built differently.  Some people are born with OCD tendencies, or they’re more hyper competitive, or they’re Autistic, or they’re geniuses…  we’re ALL different. Yes, some of those things need to be treated so that individuals can function in society.  We don’t just LET people be paranoid schizophrenics, but that’s because they HURT other people.  Being LGBT doesn’t hurt anyone.

(“It does though!   It does!   It is destroying our society to just accept!!!  The Bible says it’s wrong and we need to live by what the Bible says!”)

Um… no, no WE don’t.  You go right ahead and do that.  I know church won’t let you say this, but the bible has theories and stories, just like big bang is a theory, just like the atheists may be wrong… but that’s not what I’m talking about here… I’m thinking about logic and science… so I’m CURIOUS.

Okay..  so if we are born hard wired to be attracted to who we’re going to be attracted to… Isn’t it POSSIBLE that there are a lot of other things hard wired into us as well… We KNOW that personalities are based on both nature and nurture… And I find myself wondering if just because we walk like ducks and talk like ducks and the whole world tells us we’re ducks, are we really?

I have read a lot about how truly close in DNA and in chemical makeup men and women really are…  there is so little variation between genders… isn’t it POSSIBLE that in some people’s minds… that they mentally DO see themselves as the other sex and believe they’re the other sex?

For me, (ugh… am I REALLY going to write this?  Well, if you’re still reading I guess I’ll go ahead and share…), I’m PRETTY sure I have an excess of testosterone.  Why do I say this?  Well, first, there’s that complete lack of mothering instinct.  I was born without it.  I don’t have it at all… But more than that… Facial recognition software almost ALWAYS thinks I’m a man.  There’s something about the structure of my face that makes me masculine…  and finally, there’s the whole facial hair thing.  Not nice, soft, facial hair.  Stubbly man hair… to the point that when I went to get it waxed they told me I couldn’t because it was “man hair.”  They said those words.  Humiliating… because in my head I KNOW I’m a woman…

But in Jenner’s head… Jenner knew that, too.  Jenner knew Jenner was a woman.  Jenner’s hormones said that during J’s entire life.

(“But God made him a MAN!  My own eyes TELL me that’s a man!   I know a man when I see one!!” )

Remember, leave religion out of this.  I’m truly trying to be logical and scientific. Just because it looks like a chupacabra to you… is it really?

Just because it’s something different than what’s “right” to you is that what it has to be? I’m not so sure…

(“I’m sure because HE had to get SURGERY to make him look like a woman.  HE is a man.” )

Again, I’m not so sure… Women AND men get surgery ALL the time to make themselves look more like how they think they should look.  We chastise and shame the “cat lady” and the Joan Rivers of the world and make fun of them for getting TOO much plastic surgery… Ah, but what’s a little ol’ boob job if it makes you feel better about yourself, right?

You can get a fake tan and dye your hair and put on some concealer.  Should THAT be allowed?  If that’s the way that GOD made you shouldn’t you just accept everything about yourself and make NO alterations?

…getting off track there, Tamara… SCIENCE remember??? So I’m just wondering…  Is the greatest athlete in the world (circa 1976) a man just because that’s what our EYES tell us?  Isn’t there more to a person than their appearance?  I don’t know what the ratio of testosterone to estrogen is running through Jenner’s system… I don’t know what J’s NATURE makes J think. I just know I think it’s really really interesting… .

..and I know that I STILL have a really hard time believing that “chupacabra” is really a racoon.